Having a random hookup so left but love u
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize