Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Randomize