What did we do last night that was yellow?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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