this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
