Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize