he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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