The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
sex in a hospital.. check
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
