Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
So vagazzling was a success
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
