Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
