Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
