Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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