He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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