she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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