I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
He has the fingertips of a God
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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