He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize