is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Rumble strips road head = magical
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
