I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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