Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
