Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize