he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I am one with the molecules
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize