Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
