Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
