were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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