i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize
