shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Too much gin, very little bucket
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Randomize
