This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
