You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
