My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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