ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
