This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Randomize
