sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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