Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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