there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
