why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
