i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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