the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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