Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
