I wannas sexs uuuuu
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
