I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
and you fell through a lawn chair
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
