the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
