I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
