Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
It's not a walk of shame if you run
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
