I wish I could punch you in the face.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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