We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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