Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
