yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
So many bounce houses so little time
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
