so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
