I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
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