I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
