I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
