So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
