I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
operation harelip BJ is a go
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
